Funeral Service for Lil Frohlich
The funeral service for Lil Frohlich, June 27, 2024.
Lillian (Lil) Frohlich — A Life of Giving
This is a summary of Lil Frohlich’s life story, as compiled by Ron Riesenbach with the help of an AI program using audio and video interviews, family trees, copies of written eulogies and other relevant documents. The resulting story was further edited and refined family members.
Remembering Lillian Frohlich
Lillian (Lil) Frohlich was a quiet, unassuming woman, but yet remarkable in so many ways. Born Lillian Guberman on October 20th, 1932, in Winnipeg, Manitoba, she was a vibrant, loving soul who enriched the lives of all who knew her. Her story, interwoven with the threads of family, community, and the ever-changing landscape of Winnipeg, is one that deserves to be told and cherished.
Roots in the Old World
Lil’s story began with the individual journey of her parents, Charna and Norman, from the depths of Bolshevik Russia. Charna and Norman were first cousins (their respective fathers were brothers). Charna Guberman arrived in Canada in July of 1928 at the age of 18. The ship’s manifest shows that her birthplace was Mestecko, Russia (which is now part of Slovakia). Two of her uncles, Max and Alex Guberman, who were already in Winnipeg, brought her over, notionally recording in her immigration papers that she was to be a “Domestic Servant”. After arriving, she lived with her aunt Faiga her father’s sister. Sadly, Charna’s parents (Yankel and Perla) and her siblings (Zivel and Manya), were unable to leave, as the borders closed. Manya survived the war, but Zivel died in WWII.
Lil’s father Norman Guberman came from Polonnoye in the Ukraine (about 300km west of Kiev). Norman’s parents were Aaron Guberman and Perel (Bassie) (nee Buntzis). Norman’s father was a brick layer who immigrated to Canada in the Spring of 1914. Aaron left his wife and four children behind as he worked to establish himself in Winnipeg. With the breakout of WW1 followed by the Russian revolution Aaron was not able to communicate with his wife and children. A few weeks before Pessach 1921, Bassie and her children, aided by her brothers, decided to try to get to Canada themselves and set off to cross the Polish border. They made their way to Warsaw without passports and little money trusting to Jewish people and agencies on the way. In Warsaw at the Jewish Immigrant Aid Society office, they found that Aaron had indeed tried to reach them, leaving messages and contact information. In a few weeks, money and steamship tickets were wired to them from Winnipeg, travel documents were acquired, and they made their way to Antwerp to catch the ship “Montreal” to Quebec City. Norman and his family arrived in Winnipeg by train on July 21st, 1921.
Charna and Norman never met in the old-country. The tale of how Charna and Norman met in Winnipeg is a mystery, even to Lil herself. Whether it was a family arrangement or a chance encounter amongst the other newcomers to the city, remains unknown. But it was a connection that led to, courtship, marriage and eventually to Lil’s birth at St. Joseph’s Hospital in Winnipeg.
Initially, the Gubermans lived in a single room in a relative’s house on Aberdeen Avenue – a relative whose name was Boxy Bremond <possible mistaken translation>, and whose precise relationship to them is not clear. They soon moved to a two-room suite on College Avenue, where Lil remembers sleeping in her own bed next to her parents. From there they moved to the Renfrew Apartments on Perth Ave, where Lil would spend much of her childhood. This was a modest beginning, but these early years instilled in Lil a deep appreciation for family and a modest lifestyle.
Her father, Norman, worked in retail, first in a small store in Saskatchewan, before Charna, pregnant with Lil. With a child on the way, Norman decided to return to Winnipeg to make his living. He and two partners then opened a clothing store called “The Hub Clothing,” – a classic Winnipeg “Shmatah” business. This was a busy time, with the partners and their wives having a very active social life that included a reading circle, playing poker with friends, and participating in the Hebrew Fraternal Lodge. Her mother, Charna, worked in a factory when she first arrived and lamented that she would have been a nurse in the old country. When the family moved back to Winnipeg from Saskatchewan, Charna stayed home to look after Lil. When Lil was about eight or nine Charna took ill with tuberculosis and was hospitalized for four or five months. Charna was often in poor health. After she had been sick with tuberculosis Charna was worried about having more children in case it would jeopardize her health. This was a significant factor in why the Gubermans only ever had one child.
Education and Community
Lil’s education was as much about her cultural heritage as it was about academics. She began her schooling at Peretz School on Aberdeen near Salter, where she received a half-day of Jewish studies in Yiddish and Hebrew and another half-day of English instruction. This immersion in Yiddish was an important part of her upbringing; she spoke Yiddish with her parents at home and with her aunts and uncles. The Peretz Shul and all that came with it was an important foundational element in her life. After grade seven, she went to McCrae School, an intermediate school, and continued her Jewish education twice a week at night, all the way through Grade 10. She completed her secondary education at St. John’s Tech, earning a Grade 12 matriculation, which at that time was considered the equivalent of a first-year university credit.
Though she might have pursued university, she chose instead to attend business college. There, she learned bookkeeping, typing, and shorthand; skills that helped her work in an office. These skills also proved useful in her volunteer work with the Peretz School and with B’nai B’rith. While she described herself as just an average student, she demonstrated a sharp mind and a curiosity that stayed with her throughout her life. She was never one to shy away from learning something new, including driving a car when she was in her forties.
Her social life during these years was not defined by the typical “Y” (YMHA) activities, as was common among many of her peers. As she lived in an apartment building, she didn’t have the same social structure as others who lived in individual homes. Despite this, she did not feel deprived knowing that she was very loved and protected by her parents. She was very close to her friends from Peretz, Nina Chisvan, Lorraine Prassow, and Mona Juravsky. She also very much cherished her close relationship with her cousin Ghittel (Giddy) Bendel; in later life she would say that they were like sisters. The Peretz School community was very important to her. She attended Friday night events at the school where students would read poems. Later in life, with her marriage into Chuck’s large family, her social life expanded greatly.
Love, Marriage, and Family
Lil met her beloved husband, Chuck (Charles Eli) Frohlich, through a mutual friend, Lionel Feuer, who lived next door in the Renfrew Apartments. At a wedding to which she needed a date, she invited Chuck, and, in her own words, “even though he couldn’t dance, he had fabulous other qualities.” Their courtship was warm, respectful and dignified. Lil said that she simply knew they were meant for each other. Chuck lived with his sisters on Alfred Avenue at the time and they made Lil a Shabbat supper when the couple got engaged. It was a very special night for Lil as she grew up with mother who “kicked her out of the kitchen”.
On January 8th, 1956, Lil and Chuck were married at the Hebrew Fraternal Lodge. Her bridesmaids were her sister-in-law, Sylvia Frohlich, and friends, Mona Juravsky and Phyllis Adler. Rabbi Hurszon officiated at the wedding. There were some obstacles to the couple’s nuptials, however. Just before their wedding, her father’s store, “The Hub Clothing”, burned down. Tragically, there was no insurance, so the family had to borrow money for the wedding. Yet, despite this significant setback, Lil said that they had a beautiful celebration with a gown made especially for her and a wonderful reception with a cake made by Mrs. Soslofsky.
After the wedding, the newlyweds moved into an apartment on Alfred Avenue, but quickly left due to a cockroach infestation. They moved back to the Renfrew Apartments, across the hall from Lil’s parents. Their family life began soon after with the birth of their first child. Their three children: Perla, born March 3rd, 1958; Arnold, born February 17th, 1960; and Jack, born December 1st, 1963, became the center of their universe. Lil was very devoted to her children. They eventually moved to their first house at 10 Dahlia Avenue in Garden City in 1959. The house cost $14,000 (a lot of money in those days). This address became a hub of family activity; synonymous with family gatherings, holidays and celebrations.
Lil embraced her role as a stay-at-home mother, dedicating herself to raising her children and creating a warm and loving home. She often wondered how families managed when both parents worked. She would be proud of their accomplishments but would remind her career-orient kids: “Somebody’s got to look after the children.” As Perla recalled, many of the Frohlich family members felt welcomed to visit 10 Dahlia, making it an important family landmark. Lil always wanted the extended family to be connected and for all to be welcomed. As we know, it was always a busy home; open and welcoming.
Community Involvement
Lil’s life was not confined to her home. She was deeply involved in her community, particularly in B’nai B’rith, where she served as program chair and president. Her involvement also extended to Peretz School, where she devoted much of her time, often making latkes for school events. Along with Chuck, she was a member of the Saturday Night Group, and she took part in a mah-jong group. We remember how much she enjoyed playing mah-jong with her friends.
In their earlier years, Lil and Chuck were members of the Ashkenazi Shul, where, for many years, Lil would sit upstairs with the other women in what she referred to as the “Vibeshe Shul,” the women’s section, with Baba and her friend, Claire Wiezelman. She did not attend every Shabbat, but would come for all “Yontif”, especially Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashannah, as it was only a 10-minute walk from her aunt Faiga’s home. Later, they joined the B’nai Abraham shul and for the last few decades of her life the Rosh Pina (later Etz Chaim) shul where she and Chuck became regular attendees. Her family’s dedication to Judaism and the Jewish community was a strong value she passed down to her children.
A Life of Giving
Lil had a deep connection to her family, which was clear throughout her life. She valued spending quality time with them and never forgot important details of her grandchildren’s lives. Despite her busy social calendar, she always had tabs on the entire extended family. Lil made regular trips to both Toronto and Israel to visit her children and grandchildren until travel became too difficult, at which point she embraced technology to stay connected.
Her generosity was not limited to family; she extended her kindness and warmth to everyone she met. She had a genuine interest in others, often learning their life stories within a short time of meeting them. We remember how, when she was admitted to Deer Lodge hospital, she was able to tell the stories of a number of the staff working there within a few hours of her arrival.
Lil’s compassion also came across as a deep empathy for those who experienced misfortune. As she once told her grand-daughter Jona: “You don’t have to pity people, but you should have empathy”. She was indeed empathetic to all – never criticizing or judging anyone’s life circumstance.
She had very deep ties to her heritage, and particularly to Yiddish culture. She made sure her children were able to attend Peretz School. We recall her speaking of her love for the language with her son, Arnold. This love of the Yiddish language stayed with her throughout her life. She was very proud of her generation’s ties to Yiddish culture, which she saw as being associated with the establishment of the State of Israel.
Lil was raised with a deep connection to her family and heritage. She knew that “blood is not water” and family is very important. This connection was made even more profound when Lil’s first cousins, Jenny and Paulina Kempfer, came from Russia and were sponsored by her mother. Even after Charna passed away, Lil kept up the connection to her cousins.
Challenges and Resilience
Lil experienced her share of challenges, but she faced them with a remarkable spirit of resilience and optimism. Her father’s store burning down just before her wedding, caused financial hardships. This was a very difficult time for the family, but did not prevent them from having a wonderful celebration. And when her mother got sick, she made it her priority to support her and ensure her comfort. In her later years, she was a devoted caregiver to her husband, Chuck, as his health deteriorated.
Lil, like many of her generation, also grew up during a time of great uncertainty and change. She witnessed the Second World War as a young girl. She lived through a time of profound change for the Jewish people, and she was profoundly happy that Israel became a state in 1948. She was even a member of “Habonim”, a Labour-Zionist youth movement.
A Legacy of Love
Lil’s move to 45 Bolton in her final years enriched her life by reconnecting her with old friends and new acquaintances. She was able to live in relative comfort until just a few short months before her death. During this time she participated in all the social, exercise and entertainment programs at the residence. She loved playing Wii bowling as it brought back fond memories of bowling with her husband.
Lil and Chuck were blessed with nine grandchildren: Ariel, Noah, and Carmi (Perla’s sons); Jona and Brynne (Arnold’s children), Meital, Elisheva, Leora, and Ronee (Jack’s daughters). Lil later became a great-grandmother to Maya, Isla Charley, and Coby. Lil was very proud of her grandchildren and their achievements. This is obvious in her final days when, even on her deathbed, she expressed great joy at the arrival of her new great-granddaughter, Isla Charley. She reached out and touched the phone when she saw the baby on a video call and said in tears, “She’s so beautiful.”
Lil always had an appreciation for all she had and a positive outlook on life. As she liked to say: “I am so lucky”.
Lil passed away peacefully on June 25, 2024, surrounded by her loving family. She died at the Simkin Centre, after being transferred there from St. Boniface Hospital’s palliative care ward a few short weeks earlier. Even in her final days at the Simkin Centre, she continued to express her love of family and gratitude for the 91 years that she had.
We are all fortunate to have grown up with the wisdom of her generation and her love. Perla, her daughter, chose a special passage from Jewish tradition to say at her funeral. In the words of the “Eshet Chayal” blessing that we say every Friday night: “A woman of Valor. Seek her out for she is to be valued above rubies. Her family trusts her and they cannot fail to prosper. All the days of her life she is good to them.”
Her son, Jack, referred to a particular saying in Pirkei Avot, (Ethics of Our Fathers): “More than you should study, you should do”. As Jack said in his eulogy: “If we were to sum up your 91 and a half years, you focused more on doing than studying. And almost wholly doing for others.” Jack remarked that her life was focused on others, with little time given to “self-fulfillment” or “what do I need to be happy”. Lil’s concern was more about the needs and happiness of others. This observation captures a key essence of Lil’s approach to life.
As her granddaughter Brynne said in her eulogy, “Baba’s biggest pride and joy was family.” She “instilled in all of us values of connection, quality time and gratitude.” And as her Rabbi pointed out, she was always welcoming and comforting. The Rabbi also noted that she had a “deep connection with her Jewish values and with ‘Yiddishkite’”. Her mother, Baba Charna taught her a lot of life lessons that were offered in their mother tongue of Yiddish. As Lil told us: “It doesn’t matter what language they are in, right hon? They are like life lessons!”.
And now, as we reflect on Lil’s life, we are reminded of how deeply she touched each of us. She left behind a legacy of kindness, warmth, and love. We will remember her warm smile, her generosity, her genuine interest in others, and her unwavering devotion to her family and community. She will forever be in our hearts.
We were so fortunate to have her in our lives.
